Losing One's Religion...

People go through life constantly clinging to something for meaning or a concrete idea of what their lives should stand for. I claim to "know" nothing definitely; however, I am always amazed when texts collide, especially when I remember something I was taught, read, or encountered when I was very young. I went to a Christian, private, Baptist school 1st-4th grade, until my parents could either no more abide by their hypocrisies/ judgment, or afford it (I am not sure, as I was ~9 & didn't know about their finances) ;) 

When grading this week (for my American Lit class), I was listening to music; I read an article about R.E.M.'s song "Losing My Religion;" it was very controversial at the time; however, again...I was very young when it was released (February 19, 1991--so just 3 years old); this phrase "losing my religion" also apparently is something Southerners say meaning "being at the end of one’s rope, and the moment when politeness gives way to anger. But if you were missing that key detail, you’d think that Stipe’s vague imagery was clearly a comment on the Judeo-Christian tradition" (Evan Schlansky, 2011). We have ALL gone through that (if we are truthful with ourselves)...being unsure or even majorly stressed out: "at the end of our ropes."

Side-note: I also learned from this interesting article by Schlansky that the odd winged man in the actual music video was inspired by a short story by the now deceased Gabriel García Márquez called "A Very Old Man With Enormous Wings." I so want to read it and another which supposedly inspired "November Rain" by Guns N' Roses ["Without You" by Del James]. I seriously need a few clones! 

While I was lesson planning today (for my ENGL1010 class), I was struck by John Proctor's emotionally charged lines during Act III of The Crucible. He has just been outwitted by vindictive female children of the community; his wife & he will now most likely be hung; plus, he has given up his good name for nothing! 

When all is lost, sometimes we really do feel like we are "losing our religion," or at the end of our own individual rope. And we should be allowed that uncertainty, as humans. He then says "God is dead!" He may or may not have believed/meant that; however, he does say a whore (Abigail) got put on a pedestal above heaven (Elizabeth Proctor), so who knows. 

However, I related that to Jesus in the NIV version of the Christian Bible [questioning God in his time of need], during the 9th hour of his torturous crucifixion/ death: "Jesus cried out in a loud voice, 'Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?' which means, 'My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?' " (Matthew 27:46) I won't pretend to "know" if any of this happened, or even more modern in "history," if characters like Proctor had to really deal with crazed witch-hunting Bible thumpers horrifically-- like Miller outlines it for us in fiction; however, fascinating literary connections!